If you suffer with social anxiety disorder (SAD), or tend to be on the shy side, the idea of having out-of-town guests visiting for your wedding may be cause for concern. What are your responsibilities to your guests, and how much entertaining do you need to do? When you are already feeling overwhelmed by the social obligations of a wedding, entertaining friends, family, and sometimes strangers may be cause for concern. Fortunately, with advance planning, you do not need to be a tour guide in addition to a bride or groom. Below are some tips to make your guests self-sufficient during their stay.
- Recommend hotels. Avoid having out-of-town guests stay with you or your relatives if at all possible. You and your family do not need the stress of having house guests at this busy time. Let them know that by having all your guests stay at a particular hotel you will be able to negotiate a better group discount.
- Provide information. Research hotel options, local attractions, and transportation. Put together an information sheet to send to out-of-town guests, and leave it up to them to make decisions about where to stay and what to do. Try to take into account your guests' tastes and preferences and give them a range of options.
- Assemble gift baskets. Put together gift baskets for your out-of-town guests to be left in their hotel rooms. In addition to toiletries and token gifts, include coupons for local attractions to encourage guests to explore the area on their own.
- Provide an itinerary. Make sure that out-of-town guests receive itineraries and maps outlining the events for the wedding day. If there is a long break between the ceremony and reception, they can plan for it rather than feeling awkward about having nothing to do for several hours.
- Make time for guests. If you are feeling up to it, and would like to see more of your out-of-town guests, plan a brunch or barbecue for the day following the wedding. This could also be an occasion for gift-opening, if you or your spouse have the energy. Remember though, most people will be tired from the previous day. Keep any gathering short and informal.
- Don't be a tour guide. Some guests may choose to turn their trip into a vacation instead of simply visiting for your wedding. Remember that you don't have to entertain these guests for the duration of their trip. You simply don't have the time or energy to be a tour guide right now.
Bottom line - this is one time when you are not required to entertain out-of-town guests. You are busy enough with the social obligations of your wedding. Spend time with your friends and relatives only because you want to, not because you feel that it is expected of you.
Source: Kiss Me Goodnight: Dating Tips and Relationship Advice. How to Accommodate Out of Town Wedding Guests. Accessed October 20th, 2008.
