Wedding etiquette typically requires the bride and groom to mix and mingle throughout their wedding reception making sure to speak personally with all of their guests. If you suffer with social anxiety disorder (SAD) or just extreme shyness, the prospect of having conversations with potentially hundreds of friends and relatives in one night may have you thinking about calling the whole thing off.
Instead of letting your anxiety get the best of you, consider some of the following tips to make the process of mixing and mingling during your wedding reception a little easier.
- Hold pre-wedding events to get to know your guests better. Some ideas include a golf tournament, day at the spa, or expanding the rehearsal dinner to include all of your guests. Although it may seem like adding social obligations on top of the wedding is the last thing that you need, spending time with your guests in advance will give you a leg up on the big day. Bonding activities such as these will give you something to talk about during the reception.
- Use name tags. If you are concerned about remembering your guests' names, consider having them wear name tags along with useful tidbits of information about who they are, such as "co-worker of the groom" or "second cousin of the bride." You could even have guests add interesting information about themselves, such as where they traveled from or for the bold, the fact that they are single. While name tags can be passed off as a tool to help guests get to know one another better, you can use them to keep names and faces straight if anxiety kicks in.
- Disguise your mingling as a mission. If idle social chatting has really got your stomach in a knot, consider using your time with guests to do something productive such as having them sign your guest book. This strategy gives you a purpose as you mingle, and gives you an excuse to move on to the next table if you start to get anxious.
- Enlist the support of your spouse. If you have a particularly outgoing partner, let her take the lead in meeting your guests. Have her make introductions when greeting guests that you do not know well. Without the pressure of making introductions, you may find it easier to relax and simply thank your friends and family for sharing in your day.
Most importantly, remember to take some time alone when you need it. If anxiety becomes overwhelming, take a walk outside or spend a few minutes in the restroom. Make sure that your spouse recognizes your need for time away and does not criticize you for it. Above all, if social anxiety is severely affecting your daily functioning and you have not yet received treatment, make an appointment with a mental health professional. Coping strategies are best used in combination with a recognized form of treatment for SAD, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy or medication.
Sources:
Wedaholic. Tips And Advice On How To Get Guests Mingling At Your Wedding. Accessed October 11, 2008.
The Wedding Post. The Shy Guy Syndrome. Accessed October 11, 2008.
