Frustrated
- Hi everyone, I'm a freshman in college this year and everything about college has scared me to death. I tried going out and going to parties, but that made everything worse because I would drink heavily to get rid of my shyness and then make bad decisions. Even though no one confronts me or says that anything I do is wrong, I carry all my mistakes with me everywhere I go. It is near impossible for me to eat in the cafeteria or go to class now because I feel like everyone is judging me for past mistakes. I want to stress here that I am trying so hard and am on medication with therapy, but sometimes the only reason I'm still here is because I promised my family I would get through it without becoming suicidal or having those thoughts. It's great to see that other people struggle with me, I'm thinking about all of you and I hope together we can climb this mountain and help each other. I'm frustrated and at the end of my rope so if anyone has any ideas, I'm here :)
- —Guest liz
The hardest thing
- I wake up for an early class every day and when I walk out of my dorm I just wish that the entire campus was empty. Then I see a person and my anxiety starts up. Despite all the drugs I'm prescribed I cannot go out to parties unless I'm very drunk, which in itself is not a good thing. I never voluntarily speak in class, but when I do speak on something I know I still get extremely nervous, hot, and flushed. I can make social contact but the initiation of the interaction is the most difficult. Even when I am in a group I am convinced everything I do is being judged. I can't be genuinely happy. I am on some new meds and maybe a new psychiatrist, we shall see how that goes.
- —Guest rob
Hiding
- Thats the best word to describe what I do when I get really anxious. I have had anxiety since school and now at university. Last year I did well academically and this gave me a boost but this year has been the opposite with more presentations and seminars. This anxiety also effects my social life MASSIVELY!!! Over the years I've pushed freinds away, pulled out of relationships and avoided numerous events. I must say though that the herbal remedy was a saviour when it came to getting through my exams. Hopefully I'll soon find the best treatment.
- —Guest gill
Now that I'm aware
- I'm 25 and attempting to finish my last year of college this fall. I've withdrawn from classes 4 times already and entered counseling to address this issue only to discover that social anxiety has been at the root of my struggles from high school on. I dropped out of sports and all social activities in high school and developed an eating disorder and depression. I didn't even go to my own graduation. I slowly learned how to deal with giving speeches and socializing with my peers but one of the main areas social anxiety shows up in my life is hitting a wall when it comes to producing schoolwork. I love studying but when I have to write a paper or take a test I feel absolute dread like there's no way I can pull it off. To deal I overcompensate and am over prepared so as not to be put on the spot. I had no idea anxiety was even an issue for me until 2.5 months ago so it will be interesting to see how school goes now that I'm aware. I've missed out on so much of my life already.
- —Guest salome
Skipping Out
- I would drive twenty minutes to class and if I was a minute or two late, I wouldn't go in. I couldn't bear the thought of walking in late and having everyone look at me while I tried to find a seat. I would always skip the first day of class too because I didn't want to introduce myself or have to talk in front of people. Don't even get me started on speeches! College is stressful enough, having SAD just makes it ten times worse.
- —yellowmello
Debilitating
- The worst part is sitting in class and waiting around to be called on. As soon as they say my name my heart starts pounding and I just know I'm not going to perform well speaking. Sometimes when someone says something funny I find it hard to keep a straight smile because of the self awareness issue. Then when I do mess up I remember what that person's face looked like when they realized I was shy like oh better leave this one alone or that look like they are better than me because I have anxiety. Or sometimes like a confused look and then I'll think about that situation a lot and it can sometimes lead to depression.
- —Guest Eric
my experience..
- Hi, I'm Sarah, 18 years old. Having social anxiety is really paralyzing.. I can't even do simple tasks like buying stuff for myself. I even became agoraphobic and I can hardly go out of our house. I feel stuck and worthless because I can't go out and free myself from the anxiety. Every time I force myself to go out my heart beats so fast and my whole body is shaking. I feel so anxious even walking in the street. Sometimes I can't even say hi to my high school classmates because I feel extremely shy and of that I feel ashamed until my depression triggers again. Most of the people around label me as quiet, shy, and a loner. And I can hardly accept the truth that my personality became an introvert one. I always ask myself why am I afraid of other people's shadows.. Why can't I control it? And why is it that the more I fight the stronger it gets. I don't know what to do anymore.=(
- —emz10
Mystery
- I didn't know at all that I had probably been suffering from SAD my whole school life. I'm in university right now, with nice people and environment. People often compliment me by saying that I'm beautiful, but I've been ugly my whole life and have been picked on and teased by my classmates. I know I'm not ugly anymore but the discomfort remains, and the low self-esteem never leaves, especially around the opposite gender. I feel depressed most of the time. Happiness and opportunities dance in front of me, literally begging me to grab them, and I still don't see them. Sometimes I never have anything, and at other times I have it all but I choose to throw it away. I was a toastmaster once and have given some outstanding speeches recently. People applauded me and praised me for my great confidence. Little do they know that public speaking is not the same as talking to people on a one-to-one basis. I suck at it. I don't make any friends and stay alone most of the time.
- —Guest d3pth
No fun
- I've only just realized that the fear and anxiety I have been suffering most of my young life is social anxiety disorder. For a long time I thought I was just really shy or that I was just afraid of public speaking like a lot of other people. My fear unfortunately is worse than just that. Physically I become ill at the thought of speaking in front of people. My hands shake, I can't breathe, I want to throw up, I get major headaches and the mere thought of having to speak in front of my class makes me want to disappear. I start Grad school tomorrow and I have been in such a major state of panic that I haven't been able to sleep for the last week. I bought the Lefkoe Method dvd's and have been trying them out in hopes of getting better. We'll see how it goes. I'm glad I'm not alone with this issue. Most people don't get it when I try and explain the level of fear I feel sometimes.
- —ROinLA
Tough
- It's really tough... I didn't realize that I had this problem until the summer between high school and college. I tried to create a new identity when I came to college but it didn't last long at all. I feel like I have no future whatsoever, and it's affecting everything I do. I'm a smart kid but I've slowly lost my drive over the years. It all seems really pointless when you think you're going to be alone for the rest of your life.
- —Guest N
It's tough
- Yeah, going to school with SAD is tough. I dread going to the first day of class and the teacher asking everyone to introduce themselves! I have a presentation tomorrow and I'm trying to stay positive, but I know I am going to be extremely nervous, but I've learned that you just have to face your fears to overcome them, so I'm going to do it! Plus I need to do it to pass the class. Thinking about taking a public speaking course or going to the toastmaster meetings.
- —Guest joe
Really Bad
- This anxiety is really affecting my attendance, grades, relations, seeing my life and my future in a different way not as I planned for at ALL, feeling sissy, afraid and depressed. But I think I'll get better after I apply some of the simple things I read in the "Coping" Section. I'm already starting to feel good. Thanks poeple!
- —Guest AT-Delpi
Previous16-27 of 27
