From the article: Phone Phobia
Some people with social anxiety disorder are afraid to make or receive telephone calls. People who have a "phone phobia" may experience symptoms such as a shaking voice, racing heart and shortness of breath when talking on the phone or trying to make calls. How do you handle making phone calls? Do you avoid the telephone or procrastinate about making calls? Share Your Experiences
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- Finding this certainly makes me feel so not alone. If only I had people in my social circle/work/family that could relate. I don't seem to have a problem with people face to face although group settings are avoided - such as church, parties. The phone thing has just gotten so out of hand and I am in no mood to talk it over with a therapist. The thought of that is almost as bad as talking on the phone. I too have lost countless friends. My boss is getting increasingly irritated when I don't answer his calls - not at work but when he has a question on my days off he will call and I avoid answering or returning his call. Even some of my family members have been hurt because I don't call them. I can call my husband and my parents but that is it without issue but anyone else - forget it. It's the worst possible feeling. I wish people would be more understanding but they aren't. I will email or talk in person but the phone - forget it!
- —Guest guest too
insecurities, low self steem ?
- I am 28. I have been dealing with low self steem/anxiety for like 10 years. Something happened that wrecked my nerves when I was 18 and I have been dealing with it all this time with no medication (maybe one year on them). My hair was falling like crazy at 19 and was almost completely bald at 20. Only recently I have been making progress by myself because really there is nothing else and no one else. I have long list of insecurities and this phone thing was one of them. But I have gotten better, my hair is actually growing , I can see stubs that were not there. The reason I am writing this is because if you have a fear such as this is because there is a root for it. I know all my fears were because of the same root and thus fixing that I am becoming normal, little by little. I made a phone call today to check why an order wasn't going through with paypal. I place it, end of story, no reason to think it over.
- —Guest dave
Not quite a phobia, but still sucky
- I've had this problem for a while now, but it's gotten worse the older I've gotten. I didn't used to have this problem when I was a teenager, young adult (I'm 30 now). But now, there are 5 people that I will call and talk to, no problem. My parents, my husband, my brother, and my best friend. That's it. Everyone else, I either have to suck it up and rehearse in my head wheat I'm going to say, or I just don't do it. I just got some birthday cards in the mail from some members of my husband's family (that I have no problem talking to in person), and we just got into a fight about whether or not I was going to call and thank them. Just the idea of doing that makes me start to panic, and he thinks I'm being ridiculous. I don't know if I can go so far as to say that this is a phobia for me, because I can do it if I have to. I would much prefer to talk to strangers than people I know, however. Order pizza, call the doctor, call my kids' schools, no problem. Call my sister-in-law? Can't do it
- —rweber82
making a call
- I don't have trouble talking with strangers I just have problems with making a call and talking with family or friends, help I wanna get over this.
- —chichia54
Lessen Anxiety “Answer Right Away"
- I'm a Realtor & really good at faking being in control so my fear of talking on the phone, for the most part, remains hidden. It’s progressively gotten worse though and I get severe anxiety even just thinking of making a call. So I put it off. And off again; obsessing and worrying about it. I deferred to emailing; thinking it was easier but because of my OCD, I can't compile a simple email either. It can take more than an hour or two before that “simple’ email is ready for me to hit “send”. So this last New Year’s eve, I made my 1st heartfelt, REAL resolution. ANSWER ALL CALLS IMMEDIATELY (if I'm awake) & RETURN CALLS QUICKLY. Answering right away, (only because I hear that little voice) still causes my pulse to race but making myself answer proves the least stressful route. More often than not, the call I took was quick and fairly painless and I’m always glad I got it over with. Another bonus? It has cut down the more dreaded: return calls I still agonize over.
- —Guest Jenn
The Telephone
- As a teen, I would neither make nor receive calls. As a young adult in university, I've had to push past my phone phobia with sheer brute force and repetition. I'm much more comfortable with text messaging, but I now have no problem answering the phone. Like another commenter though, I tend to word vomit when I have to make calls, especially when ordering something. I sweat and my heart races, I apologize for absolutely everything. It's something I am working on again with force of will and determination. With all hope, I'll continue progressing and finally be free of this. Keep positive and moving forward, peeps.
- —Guest Breanne
Amen!
- Thanks for sharing your experiences. My husband gets frustrated with me because I flat out refuse to order pizza via telephone. I would rather order the crappy pizza online than phone for the good stuff. I have the similar fears of inconveniencing others, getting bad news or tripping up my words. Working at a hospital, phone calls are particularly stressful. I have to psyche myself up and take a deep breath before talking to physicians and even fellow workers. Sometimes I use notes to help. It feels like a handicap that non-phobics do not understand. This article and others have helped me understand my phobia greatly. Now that I know it is part of social anxiety disorder and it is treatable, I can finally start on the road to recovery. To all my friends and family who see this on FB...this is why you don't hear from me so much. Embarrassing but true. I wanted you to know its not because I'm not thinking of you
- —Guest Michelle
Afraid of the phone?!!
- I have this same problem too. I didn't even know there was a phobia for it till now. I get so scared everytime my phone rings. Most of the time I don't answer it, unless I know the person. And even then, I get anxious just talking to certain people I know. And they don't understand why I don't pick up the phone. And making phone calls is just as bad. I put everything off till the last minute, and then it makes my anxiety even worse, cause people wonder why I waited so long..I've been called lazy and a procrastinator. But really I'm just really anxious to make and receive calls. I am afraid I won't know how to respond or sound stupid or dumb. This has severely impacted my life. I am 32 years old and I still have my mom make calls for me sometimes. I have SAD and ADD. It seems to have only gotten worse as I've gotten older. My mom has a panic disorder and SAD as well. And my grandma had it too. I really don't know how to handle this, but I'm scared it's gonna get worse. Glad I'm not alone.
- —Guest Joy
Can't stand phone calls
- I've never been crazy about making phone calls, but what really pushed me over the edge was an incident at one of the jobs I had. I had to call a customer and explain something to her, and she got all pissy and slung false accusations at me before hanging up. Then a short while after that, her husband called me and decided to make some legal threats, although he hadn't a leg to stand on. The whole experience unnerved me, and to this day if I have to make a call, I procrastinate and avoid it whenever possible. I get a huge knot in my stomach just thinking about calling up strangers and trying to take care of business over the phone.
- —Guest guest
BLAH
- I freak out almost every time I have to make a phone call--especially if it is to ask for something that goes against the rules. What's against the rules? Not knowing what's on the menu of a pizza place, asking for something that will be an inconvenience, etc. If I don't go into a full crying panic, I trip over my words. The worst part is when my thoughts just go blank in response to a question, and I can hear my heart beating in my ears. I'm elated when I'm finished, but only because I push the memory of how I sounded out of my head as quickly as possible. Honestly, these days, I avoid all but the most vital calls--both incoming and outgoing. Actually, all social situations are that way. If I can avoid it, I do. I have no social life outside of family and work because of this. It's pathetic and stupid. I'm 33 years old and work a minimum wage job--mostly because of this anxiety.
- —Guest somebody
Yes It's Terrible
- I've had this problem since forever. It's gotten way worse now that I am an adult (20 now), and expected to handle 'business' on my own. It isn't so bad with making calls to places I've gotten almost used to calling, or with people I'm close with, although still very hesitant to call. I guess it's not as severe as others. I can call my close family, but that's as far as I'm comfortable with. I have social anxiety elsewhere also. I have to recite over and over in my head what I should say beforehand. Sometimes I'd write down a pretend dialogue or answers to possible questions that may be asked. Sometimes it helps, mostly it does not. The thing is that if I am successful with the call, I feel very elated and proud. If not, then I become depressed and even more anxious. This has had a negative impact on my life involving possible relationships and everything else really.
- —Guest Allie
I hate making phone calls..
- I remember a time when my mum asked me to call the pizza shop and order pizza for dinner because she didn’t feel like cooking.. I couldn’t do it. I remember a time when my friend gave me his number and told me to call later.. I did eventually do it but it took at least fifteen minutes of pressing in the number, but then deleting it and not pressing dial. My friends surprise party is coming up, and I’m expected to call her sister to RSVP, I am dreading that! I also need to make an appointment for the hairdresser soon, and that involves using a phone. I have no problem with picking up most phone calls though, it’s just actually making them. I think the reason I hate calling people is because I feel like I’m bothering them, and that they wouldn’t want to speak to me, or in making appointments case, that I’ll forget what I need to say and just make an idiot of myself . It's good to know that I'm not alone with this phone phobia. It's kind of embarrassing.
- —Guest guest k
Bad Newd
- I've been developing this phobia since I was a teenager getting calls from girls. Then it wasn't fear. I just hated talking on the phone. 20 years later, I'm horrified every time it rings. Family or business. I can talk to my wife, but that's it. I've missed out on job opportunities, and pissed off creditors alike. I'm terrified of getting bad news. Or asked to do a favor that would involve money or time. I love being with my family and have no problem socializing in person. Whether its receiving or calling, it's the same. My mother thinks I hate her as does everyone else. I also am afraid to listen to voice mail and sometimes reading text messages. If I could get over this the sky's the limit. s. Eventually life happened and bill collectors would callorfamilwould call with bad news. I have
- —Guest Catman1225
Phone Anxiety Disorder
- I can't seem to shake this fear of talking on the phone. I don't have problems answering the phone, it's when I have to make a call. I'm always afraid of saying the wrong thing or sounding stupid. Sometimes my mind goes blank when on the phone, and I find myself saying um alot. I wish I could overcome this problem. Please help!
- —marcorwag
Terrified of the phone
- Before reading this page I went through an agonising experience of trying to phone up a friend to cancel a get together. I was so fraught with shaking and a full anxiety attack that I decided it is probably better to ring up later when I am calm. I am terrified of the phone and can remember being that way when I was young too, although not as bad as it is now. When I was a kid my dad installed a loud siren fixture into the house so that my mum could hear the phone when it rang as she was deaf. I recall having friends over and the siren going off and they thinking there was an emergency. Later, when normal phone noises became a little louder for my mum to hear, she could answer the phone but when it came to hearing people on the other end was difficult for her and so she would panic and force the phone onto me and I would panic and not know who was on the other end! I think I have had a bad history with phones. Today, talking on the phone gives me the physical shakes or twitches!
- —Guest scarydial
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