From the article: The 10 Worst Things to Say to a Person With SAD
People who have SAD are sometimes the target of unwelcome comments. "Why are you so quiet?" and "Why not have a drink to loosen up?" are just some of the more unhelpful things that people say. What is the worst thing that someone could say to you? Share Your Experiences
Annoyance
- I actually felt like I was starting to fit in to this new school I am going to when I started to talk to this girl. She never said anything just laughed when I did something funny. (so I thought) When the last day of school I found out she thought I was annoying. This was in 5th Grade am on my way to be a freshmen. 2 weeks till schools out. Then am a freshmen after summer.
- —Guest unknown
Can't you work on that?
- When I was a kid, I used to hate going to family functions, just because I didn't have any relatives my age and I didn't feel comfortable around any of them. I would cry and ask my parents to let me stay home, and when I told my mom how I felt, she understood and tried to talk to my dad about it, and he just said, "Can't you work on that with her?" It was horrible to hear, especially since SAD isn't something you can change overnight and with ease.
- —Guest Caelo
No one cares.
- I'm in high school, so a lot of times, people will jokingly say "No one cares" while someones in the middle of talking. It's even worse with people I don't know very well, because after opening up to them more than I usually do, it's horrible to feel like you're boring the person and that they are only listening to be polite.
- —Guest Brianna
Get over it
- If i could get over my (SAD) I would have a long time ago. Is not that simple.
- —Guest Thomas
"she's just dumb" or "you're boring"
- Hearing these words from someone you don't like, hurts, but to hear them from people you once thought loved you, is beyond painful. ...what really annoys or upsets me is that, people immediately assume that if you're quiet, or do not contribute much - conversation wise - that you're less intelligent than they. It is definitely NOT the case, and a very unfair and egotistical judgement to make about anyone, especially one who suffers social phobia.
- —Guest anonymous
Lifeless
- Everyday I hear that one simple word that rings inside my head ' lifeless' I shouldn't be offended by it yes I know but try suffering from SA and to top it off try being in a society full of teenagers. I can't express myself anymore, I started shutting down on everyone maybe it's because I had trust issues and I have a fear of making new friendships cause I already know what's going to happen in the end. Accept me for who I am and I'll show you me.
- —Guest Clark
How do you think that makes me feel?
- I shared with my husband that I was feeling stressed about going out for St Patrick's day (tommorow), hoping for some comfort or support. "Why?!?" he responded sharply. So I explained that his brother and sister-in-law made me feel uncomfortable, that I don't like crowded places (like an Irish pub, in a college town, on St Patricks day)and that I was worried about drunk drivers. His response? "Why are you telling me this now? I thought you were as excited about this as I was! Great, now I'm not even excited to go anymore!" He makes me feel so guilty for having anxiety sometimes.
- —Guest asj
You need to get out more.
- My SA was at its worst when I was a teenager. I was borderline mute, never answered phones or the door, and never left my room. In thinking I was lazy or what have you. My sister told me to get out more and essentially forced me outside. This led to more than a few panic attacks and I feel only regressed any kind of progress trying to be made.
- —Guest B
You're Just Lazy Selfish
- This one hurts mostly because it's my own fault... I tend to tell people that the reason I don't want to go to that house party with them or go ask the teacher a question is that I'm just too lazy, or don't feel like putting in the effort. That's not true in the slightest, but it's the only thing I can ever come off with when put on the spot, and there is no way I could possibly tell the truth. And then people throw it back in my face as an insult... 100% my fault, but I just don't know what else to say. :(
- —Guest Acorn
No one loves you, drop dead.
- When someone tells you that no ones love you and you should drop dead. Ouch that really hurts hearing that. It breaks your heart, you feel like no one wants you in the world and you should have never been born. You feel like dying, or you feel like a mistake. You wish that you can change yourself so that people may like you and that way you will never hear those horrible words again. It really hurts.
- —Guest Guess
Worst thing to say to someone
- You are over-reacting. Nope, I'm not. I am exact-reacting to a situation that involves high emotion . If it's too much for you... DON'T ASK!
- —Guest jason
You're so embarrassing to be with
- You can't imagine how hurt I was to hear that. I was traumatised and upset for days. I'm not sure if she meant it (that she was embarrassed to be with me), though, and no fuss was made over that comment. It still haunts me and I withdraw into myself - I'd rather be invisible than embarrassing.
- —Guest Who?
Get over it.
- "Get over it" is one of the worst possible things to say to ANYONE, and as someone who deals with anxiety (both social and general) and depression, it pisses me off.
- —Guest Stevie
worst thing
- "You are a lump on a log", coming from my husband.
- —Guest Let
You have no character
- I've only heard that once, recently. I was offended but didn't show it.
- —Guest Diary of a Shy Black Woman Blog
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